Surface Wounds
by Tjin
Summary: In Answer to Hatten JC's Challenge 'Xander gets a pet.'
1. Chapter 1

Xander growled to himself as he walked slowly back to town in the dying gloom of the overcast day.

It had been such a simple plan, three days without any demons, monsters or world ending events.

Three days with nothing but him, a boat and the wide blue ocean.

Xander grumbled as he continued with his burden.

Three days, two hundred and eighty dollars and all he had to show for it is a small three foot tuna, a bucket of bait, a half empty bottle of motion sickness pills and a dead battery on his car back at the docks.

A splatter on his head made him to look up just as the rain started to pour.

"Great. Just perfect. I could have bought the same amount of fish for seven bucks at the supermarket, I'm gonna smell like fish the entire way home and now I'm gonna chafe." He grouched as the water soaked into his clothes, continuing down the road in silence before being interrupted by a sound he had never heard before.

"MeeeeeeeYAP"

Turning around quickly Xander stared in shock at the small… whatever.

It took him a few moments to recognize it before he bent down to look at it closer.

"Hey there, you're the little guy I gave some of the fish to back on the docks." Xander said before realizing exactly how much the little fellow had grown. "You're not a demon are you?" Xander said as he stepped back in concern.

"Why yes, how ever did you guess?"

Startled by the sudden voice behind him Xander spun around and stared at the tall grey demon.

"Let me guess… it's the horns isn't it, it's always the horns." It said with a grin as Xander backed away and started looking around desperately.

"Hey, how'd you like some fish? Free of charge, just caught it today." Xander offered as the demon continued towards him at an unhurried pace.

Shrugging its shoulder, the demon looked at the fish before looking back to Xander. "No thanks, I prefer the 'Catch of the Day' myself."

Cursing his luck, Xander flipped the fish around and held it by the tail pointing the nose towards the demon. "Don't make me use this." He bluffed he threatened as the demon stared at Xander for a moment before shaking off the challenge.

"Look kid, you have guts." He said before smiling at Xander again. "I'm probably going to pull them out of you, but you do have them, and that's something I respect in this day and age. I mean most of the people you get whine FAR too much. Don't eat meat, don't kill, save the trees, ooh god you're eating my spleen. It gets old." The demon said as he looked back at Xander with a grin. "So why don't you drop the flounder and just let me eat you, I promise I'll kill you quick." The demon offered as Xander stared in shock.

Finally finding his voice Xander looked around to make sure he wasn't on camera or anything before looking back at the demon. "Has anyone ever just dropped their weapons 'feeble as they are' and just let you eat them?" Xander asked as the demon nodded.

"Oh more than you'd guess will just give up." He said before thinking on it a second, "Well, there was this one yahoo up in Tennessee, ran over me nine times with a big rig before I got to him and even then he kicked and clawed the entire way down." He said with a chuckle as he shook his head at the memory. "I'm telling you, you just can't find spirit like that anymore." He said with a sigh before looking back at Xander. "So how about it? You gonna give up or what." The demon asked as he started to advance again.

"How about a counter offer, you let me walk away and I won't have to fish-slap you into next week."

The demon thought about it a second before shaking his head. "Tempting, but… no." he said as he started forward again. This time it was a snarling hiss that brought him to a stop as the two foot long lizard stepped out of the underbrush and advanced on the demon.

Blinking at the small 'lizard' in shock the demon took a step back from Xander as it shook its head in confusion sending a shower of water about. "Hey, I've seen one of you before." He finally said as the lizard's growl started to climb in pitch.

Xander stared as the large demon continued to retreat from the small lizard.

Finally snapping his fingers as he placed where he had seen it before he pointed at it with a smile. "That's right, I saw one of you down in-- ummm… why are you glowing."

Any further comment was cut off as the pitch hit its final note.

Xander remembered a strange popping sound before waking up looking at the broad flat face of the lizard.

Moving it carefully Xander sat up and looked around in shock before noticing the still smoking form of the demon several feet away.

Standing up slowly as his muscles continued to twitch Xander looked from the corpse to the lizard, ransacking his bait bucket and back at the demon.

As the lizard finished Xander reached down and picked it up before heading back to town throwing occasional looks back over his shoulder until the demon was well out of sight.

Looking down at the sleepy lizard, Xander carefully used one hand to scratch under its chin. "I think I'll call you Sparky."

--

I Don't own nothin

Surface belongs to... whoever, just not me.


	2. Chapter 2

This plot Bunny would not leave me alone.

Hope you all enjoy it.

--

"Or maybe Edison… how do you like that one." Xander said as the small  
creature sat on his shoulder and stared at him as if he had just grown  
a second head. "Okay… we'll stick with Sparky for now." Xander said as  
he opened the door to Giles' apartment and stepped in to introduce the  
small lizard to the gang.

In hindsight he probably would have done better to come by alone and  
THEN bring the small lizard for a meet in greet.

With a scream of "DEMON" his first sight of the watchers apartment was  
that of Buffy swinging an axe in the general direction of his head.

--

Xander rested his head on the table as he tried to will the entire  
week into being nothing more then a dream, a dream he was going to  
wake from right… now…

Now… right now… okay now….

Picking his head up from the table he stared at the smiling face of  
Sparky while Buffy continued to twitch behind him. "No, bad Sparky, no  
electrocuting of the slayer." He reprimanded.

The small lizard cocked its head to the side in confusion.

"No means you've done a bad thing." He explained as the lizard looked  
back at the slayer and hissed again before scuttling off to examine  
Giles' apartment leaving Xander to deal with the glares from Giles as  
he desperately tried to revive the unconscious slayer.

"Xander where on Earth did you get that… thing." Giles said as he  
finally managed to get some smelling salts out of the first aid kit  
and grimaced as he cracked it open and held it carefully under the  
slayer's nose.

Xander watched as the older Englishman dodged back when the slayer  
instinctively swung at the bearer of the offending odor. "It followed  
me home, can I keep it?" He asked with a half smile as he tried to  
play it off as a humorous situation.

It fell flat, unfortunately, as Willow finally managed to hand Buffy a  
small mirror from her purse and the slayer got a look at herself.

With an enraged scream, she grabbed a nearby shortsword and charged  
towards the small lizard. "I LOOK LIKE HARPO MARXS YOU LITTLE DEMONSPAWN!"

Xander flinched and closed his eyes as a high pitched whine, a short  
series of pop's, and the abrupt ending of the scream heralded the use  
of his new pet's defensive measures.

"Ummm… Giles do you think I should remind Buffy that picking up a  
metal sword and charging an electrical powered creature is sort of…"  
he trailed off as Sparky finally climbed his leg and stood at his  
shoulder, hissing at the assembled demon hunters.

"Silly." Giles supplied as he picked up the discarded smelling salt  
capsule and moved towards his slayer.

"Personally I was going to go with stupid, but in hindsight, silly  
would probably let you live longer." He said as he tried to calm the  
small creature down.

"I doubt you'll have a problem with living after Buffy get her hands  
on you." Oz said as he watched the proceedings with his usual stoic air.

"Quite, I suggest you and the small hellion remove yourselves before I  
attempt to revive Buffy again." The Watcher said as he glared at the  
hissing creature before looking back at Xander. "I will want a full  
report on your last few days as well as an explanation on how you came  
into possession of this small reptilian fiend." He said before nodding  
towards the door. "I will contact you when it is safe for you and your  
friend' to return."

With a resigned sigh Xander exited the apartment and started the slow  
walk back towards his home. At the small mewling sound, Xander looked  
at Sparky before rubbing the top of his head. "It's all right, they'll  
grow to love you." He said as a passing couple made a comment about  
the size of his iguana, the Sunnydale syndrome kicking in for him for  
once. With a smirk he walked into a petshop he had once considered  
getting a dog or something for Dawn the summer Buffy ran away.

After buying a dozen small fish he left with a grinning Sparky eyeing  
the bags and making a whining sound as he intently followed the  
movement of the fish inside the plastic. "Just look at us, making  
friends and influencing people wherever we go." Xander joked before  
looking up and down the deserted street in concern. "When did it get  
so late?" He mumbled before picking up his pace slightly.

He really hoped he didn't have to deal with Vampires tonight as well.

--

Xander stared at the twitching corpse at it continued to curse at him  
as the small lizard circled it carefully as if confused why it was  
still moving.

"Umm… Sparky." He tried before it whined again and the vampire  
twitched as another jolt hit it sending it to cursing again.

Finally setting the bag down Xander grabbed the stake he usually  
carried and moved to finish off the undead when Sparky decided to take  
matters into its own paws.

Climbing up on the vampire's chest the small lizard's whine started to  
climb in pitch until Xander's teeth actually started to ache and he  
had to look away from the green glow.

With a series of pops that sounded like firecrackers, Xander looked  
back at the vampire as it twitched and thrashed from the electricity  
arching through it's body, in a matter of seconds its power raised the  
internal temperature of the leech's body to the point of combustion.

Xander stared in shock as the flaming vampire thrashed for a few  
seconds before crumbling to ash leaving a panting lizard and a  
dumbfounded Xander alone in the alley.

Picking up the panting creature, Xander checked it for burns before  
looking at it again. "Me and you Sparky, we're going places." Xander  
said as he opened one of the bags and started to feed the small  
creature as he continued on his way home.


End file.
